Dating, Topics

Finding “The One”

One day you’ll find “the one.” I promise you will. It’s a lot of waiting, trust me, I would know. But hey, maybe you have found “the one” already, and you’re enjoying the time you two share together. But enjoy it fast, and enjoy it well. Because once you have found “the one,” life will never be the same. And when I say life will never be the same, I mean, IT (life) WILL BE AWESOME. I thought I’d found “the one” for me a few times, but only recently have I found my true “one” for me. So how can you find “the one?” Here’s my three-step plan that’s totally guaranteed to work.

Step 1: Identify your beliefs/ideals & life goals

This is probably the most important step in the plan to find “the one” for you. Before you do anything, make sure you have your ideals straight. How do you expect to make a decision about “the right one” for you, if you don’t know what you believe in? Make sure you know what you want to accomplish in life too. Many of us go about looking for “the one” and have no idea what we want to do with our careers once we find “the one.” It’s important that we as the pursuers in this scenario know how we feel going into the next stage in life, and one way of doing that with stability is by having your life goals figured out. It’s very simple to do also; just make a list, go back to add details of what each item’s importance means, and then rank them in terms of achievement/easiness/success rate/etc. whatever works for you. Once that’s all done, make sure you know who you are as a person. One reason why people struggle in finding “the one” for them early in life is because they’re still growing as a person. When someone hits college/early adulthood, they pretty much know the personality they’ve developed for themselves, the ideals and beliefs they’ve created, and how that will shape the way they look for “the one.” Finally, you must be able to communicate those ideals and life goals to anyone you talk to. When looking for “the one,” it’s super important to express your ideals and beliefs with coherency, so it’s understood what you’re looking for.

Step 2: Don’t back down

When you think you’ve found “the one” for you, don’t doubt it. Well, maybe at first. But you should know within some short (or long depending on your personality) amount of time if you’ve found “the one” for you. The problem with the human mind is that we’re programmed to look for the worst possible scenario. Culture has developed a strategy to lower our expectations, and when trying to make an important decision that will impact our future lives, we can’t rely on what someone or something else has to say about what WE want. It’s our decision and our life that the decision impacts, so stick with it. Don’t doubt yourself. Just because something you might choose doesn’t feel right doesn’t mean the alternative is better. That’s why you need to make sure your ideals are straightened out. There’s a method to the madness. So when you think you’ve found “the one” for you, don’t question your judgement; stick with your gut. It’s much easier to second guess your way out of happiness, so try NOT to do that. Just follow your heart. You’ve probably made the right decision to make your life better.

Step 3: Have fun!

Seriously, there’s no fun in pursuing “the one” if you can’t have fun doing it! Just don’t get nervous and tense when pondering huge decisions. There’s nothing wrong with looking for “the one” at multiple times during your life, it’s what we’re supposed to do. So why not enjoy it while it lasts? You’re only gonna be pursuing “the one” once, and once you’ve found “the one” for you, another adventure begins. So make sure you don’t worry about it too much, and have some fun.

So there you have it! I’ve basically handed you a lifetime of happiness. I followed this plan exactly, and it led me to finding the Peppermint Hot Chocolate at Starbucks today, the true “one” for me. I realized that I needed something warm to drink before church this morning, that I LOVE Starbucks, and that it would benefit me to go there. I also decided that I couldn’t survive the morning without that rich, chocolate taste from that awesome holiday cup they now offer. I thought about getting a mocha instead, but again, you can’t back down. So guys, the plan works just like I said! Seriously, this formula works on any kind of food purchase I’ve made over the past few weeks. I just can’t believe that I’ve found “the one” for me! Now it’s your turn. Go.

 

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Dating, Topics

The Worst Date Ever

Alec is a very nice young man. He’s a Junior in High School and is about to go on a Valentines Day dinner date with his girlfriend, Susie.  Alec had just asked her to dinner the previous day and she couldn’t contain her excitement about the prospect of a romantic night out. So that night he got ready as fast as he possibly could, and got ready to pick Susie up around 4pm. As he drove to her house, he imagined the fun the two would have at dinner. When Alec arrived, he escorted her to the car, and the two briefly shared hugs and got in the car. As they pulled out of the driveway, Alec exclaimed about how “pumped” he was to get to dinner and order the biggest steak on the menu. Susie giggled as she imagined the struggle Alec was bound to have with the steak he’d order, as he usually did with steaks. He always ordered well done, making it impossible to chew easily. The two enjoyed small talk until Susie noticed a small object in the middle of the road up ahead. She stared at it up until she realized it was a small bunny rabbit.

“Alec, watch out for the bunny, don’t hit it,” Susie exclaimed, but by then it was too late.

A small thud later and Susie let out a small squeal. Alec slowed the car and pulled over to the side of the road.

“Is everything ok sweetie,” he asked, trying to sound comforting, but checking his watch at the same time, eager to get to dinner on time.

“No, not really,” Susie said sadly, “That poor rabbit just died… Can we go bury it?”

“What!?” Alec gasped, not believing what he just heard.

“It’s the least we could do, since you ran it over,” Susie said as she slowly glared at Alec.

Alec: “You can’t be serious.”

Susie: “Oh, I’m dead serious.”

Alec sat there in the seat stunned at what was happening. He quickly told Susie that he didn’t have anything to move the rabbit with or anything to bury it with either. Susie then retorted that they could just use sticks and gave him puppy eyes and a few tears until he finally gave in and hopped out of the car. Susie followed close behind as the two approached the mangled roadkill, now covered in flies. Susie covered her eyes and Alec,  while dressed in khakis with a button down and tie, grabbed a stick and dug a makeshift “grave” for the rabbit. He then rolled the remains off the road and into the small divot in the ground, all the while Susie, who was still covering her eyes, sobbed hysterically.

Alec: “Okay, it’s buried. Let’s go to dinner.

Susie: “(through tears) Can’t we have a funeral for it first? Please?”

Alec, getting extremely impatient at this point, argued his point about their lateness to dinner, but Susie wouldn’t budge until the bunny could rest in peace(s). So Alec with no sympathy, gave a quick speech about, “how the bunny never got a chance for potential greatness,” and Susie chimed in with words along the lines of, “I will always remember the kindness of your little bunny heart.” It was a little strange. Finally done with the bunny mess, the two got back in the car and started driving away. Susie then said, “Alec, take me home.”

Alec: “What? Why!??!”

Susie: “Because, I can’t go to dinner with you. You’re a bunny killer. I can’t date someone who just runs over bunny rabbits like there’s no tomorrow.”

Alec: “You can’t be serious.”

She was. After all of that mess, Alec drove her back home and dropped her off at her house. The whole ride back was spent by Susie mumbling under her breath about how, “Alec had no regard for other life forms.” After she got inside and out of view, Alec, so flustered and scatterbrained about what had just happened, called his friend Randy, and asked if he was busy. He wasn’t. The two friends then met up at the fancy restaurant that Susie was supposed to accompany Alec to, and ate two heaping plates of steak. The two shared a laugh about the nights events and enjoyed a nice dinner. All the while, Alec still scatterbrained about the rabbit, decided to forget about Susie and the craziness surrounding her love for rabbits. It was a night both to forget and remember.

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Dating, Lists, Topics

Dating Made Easy (Part 2)

Welcome to the second part of the list of the Top 10 Dates as chosen by you! This list, if nothing else, can help any couple have fun in inexpensive and creative ways. Date ideas #6-10 can be found here: Dating Made Easy (Part 1)

5. *Tie* Exploring/ Road Trip & Camping

These could go hand in hand, but then one of the contributing voters got upset that I tried to combine them. First of all, Camping is a great date idea, yes, but honestly, if you two haven’t been dating for a while, camping might not be the best idea unless you’re going with a group, then it’s perfectly alright. Camping, like anything outside, can offer fishing, hiking, marshmallows and campfires, and so much more for you and your date to do. It’s also a great time to whip out the picnic blanket and stargaze, at night, or just take a long walk in the woods! Either way, it’s a win-win for you and your date. On the other hand, Road Trips/ Random Exploring is a great idea as well. Nothing says cute like a spontaneous road trip to nowhere in particular. With you and your date just sitting and driving, it’s very relaxing to just talk and take in the scenery of wherever you’re going. These two can go hand in hand as well, by driving to the middle of nowhere and then exploring your surroundings. Girls especially love looking for cute critters like bunnies and squirrels, so you’re bound to have fun. 

4. Going out to see a Movie in theaters/ a drive-in movie

This is quite possibly the second most classic date idea: a movie. Nothing says date material like going to see a film for two hours while buying popcorn and sodas (The classic “red” soda didn’t want to comply and be used in this article so I can’t use their name. Sorry) and the ticket which combined equals somewhere around $45. The good thing for the ladies is that they don’t have to pay! Unless, they force the issue though, which doesn’t happen all that often. But (as it should be) the guys will get the tap for a fun night of movie watching. Also prep yourself for really cliché “moves” that every girl will fall for. For example:

The yawn.

This move is classic. It is where the guy gets “bored” of the movie and yawns in order to give the implication that he’s tired (see image).

yikes.

yikes.

A few notes here. First off, don’t be as creepy looking as this guy. That smile he’s wearing could scare off a zombie. And second, no movie theatre is going to be that empty. Continuing. After yawning, the guy stretches (like above) so his arm lands around the girls shoulders allowing the girl to ease into the guy and snuggle up against him. Classic movie date. And if you, the guy, manage this move to perfection, you both will be doing this within the minute.

again, yikes

Again, yikes


Oops. Sorry about the inaccuracy of this picture… not the making out part, but the empty theater and  water-mark in the middle of the pic. Sorry bout that. Moving on, another aspect of this awesome date idea is the part called “Drive-in movies.” This is the cute part of this date idea, because all you need to do is drive up in your car and bring a blanket and all the snacks you need. Nothing says love like sitting a car watching a movie. Nothing.

3. A Night In

This should be #1 in my books, but again, my ranking system determined otherwise. This is my favorite because it’s the most simple and fun. Literally anything can be done. A Night In is best served with a homemade meal, some hot coco, and a cute movie to watch together.  As a guy, the perfect night in with a date would be to make dinner for the both of us, maybe play a board or card game until we get bored with it, and then cuddle up and watch a movie (again, this is what would do. What you do with your date is totally up to you! It’s supposed to be cute and creative so have fun with it).  Other activities could include nerf-gun wars, blanket forts, painting, pillow fights, cooking together, whatever you want! It’s just a lazy night in and it’s up to you, the couple, to do whatever you want with it!

2. Picnic

Another classic and favorite of mine. Picnics are the most simple way to have a good time with no money spent. A picnic can be had at a park, a backyard, anywhere with grass and a good view really (and I’m a hypocrite in this statement, because the last picnic I had was held on a concrete  stage under an awning because it was raining). All you need is a homemade (or store-bought) lunch and a blanket to sit on. Picnics are best held in spring or fall, ideally spring. In the fall, you can accessorize with leaves and make piles and jump in them after you eat, but in spring, you can lay on the blanket and watch the clouds, birds, flowers, and enjoy each others company as long as you want. The weather is beautiful, and you shouldn’t waste it on something silly like a movie (unless it’s storming). You and your date will find a picnic to be the best option for any sunny day when you want to do something together without much hassle.

1. Going out for Dinner

Our final date idea is, yes, the oldest, yet most popular idea in the book other than a movie. And that is Going out for dinner. This is classic because it’s always been around. When a guy meets a girl he likes, and they have progressed past the coffee stage, the gentleman will ask the lady to dinner. This could be a fancy dinner (always classy) or just a regular sit-down and casual dinner. The guy will always pay the first few times though, because it’s polite. This is always a good idea, because normally it’s low pressure, but if it’s your first date together, don’t worry, just be yourself when you talk! It’s the easiest way to make a good impression. And guys, please use manners. You don’t wanna come across as a dog when you eat. But seriously, enjoy the food and each others company, because dinner together is one of the most important dates in terms of bonding and getting to know the other person.

And that concludes the list of the Top 10 Dates! I have now solved every complaint out there regarding couples not being able to find anything to do together anymore. So, you’re welcome lazy people! Here is your successful love life, all written down in comprehensive english (for those of you reading this that don’t speak/read english, I’m sorry) to take advice from and benefit from it. Now get out there and date!

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Dating, Lists, Topics

Dating Made Easy (Part 1)

Hello America! Do you struggle with finding something fun to do with your significant other? Are your dates reduced to texting back and forth with each other out of boredom, or shameless flirting on Facebook and other social media? Well get out of that rut and listen up! I’ve compiled a list of the Top 10 Dates as chosen by you! That’s right, several of my friends (and myself of course) compiled a list of the best “dates” that they could think of, and using a very confusing math formula, I ranked the results in a format to help anyone that needs a good idea for a date. This list is so well thought up, that it will be released in two parts (which is a testament to my awesome friends who helped out with this list, for the awesome and well thought out suggestions). So without further adieu, here’s part one of the list (Honorable mentions: Paintball, laser tag, bowling, camping, biking, putt-putt, hot air balloon ride, fairs/festivals, sporting events, dancing, ice cream, going to the animal shelter).

10. Concerts/ Symphonies/ Musical Shows

Musical events are great for any couple unless you live under a rock and don’t have any musical interests (I’m looking at you Patrick).

Living under a rock

Living under a rock

Music is the window to the soul some wise person told me once, so take this advice: make sure you both have similar music interests before you go to a musical event. I can’t stress the importance of this. It’s ok to have different music tastes, but if you’re going to spend money and see a concert, make sure your partner has some interest too. You don’t wanna be the one dragging them to a 2-hour show that they spend the whole time covering their ears or falling asleep depending on the artist. If you both have some interest though, it should be a rockin’ (ha ha, music pun) time. The other exception to this is of course free shows, because if it sucks, or one of you hates it, then you can just leave, no harm done! It’s also a great photo-op for couples, and it’s always neat to say that you went to your favorite artists’ show live.

9. *Tie* Ice Skating & Stargazing

These are two great options, and frankly, I was disappointed these weren’t higher on the list. But anyway, let’s dive in. Ice skating is a classic date for any couple, because more than likely, you’re going to fall, and your significant other will gladly help you up and then try to scare you into falling again. It’s kind of silly when you think about it, but lots of couples find it as a cute way to hold hands (to keep from falling). Ice skating also provides the opportunity to go and get coffee/hot chocolate/tea (whatever hot beverage you people drink) when you’re done on the ice. Believe it or not, it is cold when you skate on ice, so getting a warm drink afterwards is another good transition to having a conversation with your date which can lead to a deeper connection. Stargazing on the other hand can happen in any weather. This obviously needs to happen at night unless you’re one of those nerd couples and think to yourselves, “Well the sun is a star too, so technically, we can look at the sun through our sunglasses in the daytime if we wanted too.” Well whatever you might be right, but it’s not as romantic. If you must resort to looking into the sky during the day, try clouds. I’ll get more into that subject in another date idea. But continuing, stargazing is very peaceful for those of you who just want a quiet night to yourselves in a field where you could talk about anything. This can be accomplished by finding an open field, parking lot, or wherever your heart desires, and all you really need is a few blankets and a car. Stargazing really opens up the chance for you and your date to get to know each other better by talking, or you can just enjoy each others company by sitting in silence and looking at how awesome the sky is (Helpful hint: If it’s cold on the night that you’re stargazing, bring an extra blanket that the two of you can share. Good opportunity to cuddle. Girls are really into that I guess).

8. Seasonal Dates

Okay so this is one of my personal favorites, but I’ll try not to be biased and keep it short. Seasonal dates are exactly how they sound: Seasonal. They happen during holidays and usually are the best kind of dates. During October, you can coordinate Halloween costumes, you could have a night in and watch scary movies together (Helpful hint: Another good opportunity to cuddle if you’re a guy and the girl is scared of the movie. Girls, if your date is scared of the movie, I question his masculinity and your dating choices), or you could just go to the park (this applies to any time in the fall) and jump in a pile of leaves. Other fall activities include: Pumpkin patches, apple cider, corn mazes, football games, thanksgiving meals, making cool turkey hand crafts, and much more. And who can forget CHRISTMAS (my personal all-time favorite) which is a GREAT season to go on cute dates. One can go ice skating, sing Christmas songs, you could have a Christmas sweater photo shoot, have a Christmas movie marathon, get warm drinks together, play in the snow (snowball fights are always fun), decorate your house, make Christmas cookies, go on a horse and sleigh ride, shop at the mall, see Santa Clause, too many things to mention (like building gingerbread houses, picking out a Christmas tree, decorating it, going sledding, drinking hot chocolate, sitting by a fireplace, etc.). Of course, there’s New Years eve too, which is a good opportunity to watch the new year celebrations on TV or have your own party at home.

7. *Tie* Getting Coffee & Going to the Zoo/ Aquarium

Now, these are both good suggestions for solid dates. I’ll begin with the Zoo and Aquarium. Girls LOVE the zoo, because to them, animals (most of them anyway) seem cute and not everyone gets to see a penguin or a seal everyday. Guys love the zoo too, but mainly for the more grizzly animals like bears (ha, another pun), bobcats, snakes, etc. It’s the same for the aquarium. Fish (and penguins again) are so whimsical to us humans, that you could go there everyday and find a fish that you didn’t see the day before. It’s an interesting place to go for both the guy and the girl, so it makes a very fun date, and is normally inexpensive. Now Getting Coffee is another story in itself. This is a good first date, one where it’s no pressure and very friendly. Yes, the guy should pay (unless it’s clear that it’s NOT a date), and it’s a great time to sit and get to know each other and talk about life. Getting coffee is great to do even with a friend, to just chat and catch up on each other or study homework. Like I mentioned before, it can be fun and very low pressure. A good relationship builder if you ask me.

6. *Tie* Getting Surprised & A Night Out on the Town

Getting surprised was a very popular choice from both guys and girls, but for different reasons. Guys love giving the surprise, and girls love receiving the surprise, so it evens out quite well. An example: if it were me surprising my girlfriend, I’d make her favorite foods for dinner, grab one of her favorite movies, and show up at her place to eat and watch the movie (Helpful Hint: hopefully you’d both be comfortable with each other that showing up unannounced would be cute and fun rather than creepy). It’s very thoughtful to do for her, and she appreciates it (or at least I’d hope so) because she didn’t see it coming. It’s a good thing to try on the weekends, a rainy day, or when one of you is sick in bed, you could surprise them with soup and a good movie. Now a night on the town is different entirely. This is a good, inexpensive date to explore the city or small town where you both live. Window shopping is always fun (for the girls) and it’s a good chance to walk and talk about things you wouldn’t get to talk about if you went to a movie. In a city (or small town) there’s all kinds of tours, buildings, sights, stores, and attractions that you can see and do, and in Nashville, there are several places to go to have a good time with your date. It’s another low pressure situation for the both of you to walk and talk and have a good time together.

Part 2 (#’s 1-5 will be released on Thursday)

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